Monday, June 27, 2011

Official Story - The Contract

The next time I saw Phin we were both at a conference north of the border in the wild town of Vancouver. I was working on an essay about roundabout design and agreed to meet Phin for coffee to take advantage of his proof reading and editing skills. It was a night of great conversation in which we mostly avoided the serious talks about us. The late hour and caffeine finally kicked in and contributed to a tongue slip in which I admitted that I secretly thought dating him would be tons of fun.

The next day we took a walk around the city where the sidewalks were shoulder to shoulder with people. It was easy to tell what line of discussion was percolating in Phin’s head, but voicing any questions in the crowds was difficult. For my part, I thought it was clear that the topic was off limits, and to avoid answering the inquiring look coming from Phin, I glanced at the guy walking next to me. To my surprise my gaze locked on that of a giant lizard peering around a fellow pedestrian’s neck. I was just not expecting a lizard to be giving me such a soul searching look, and my shock took the shape of a jump to the side. There was no room for such a jump on the crowded streets, and I landed in Phin’s arms.

It seemed like people on the streets continued walking around us without missing a beat, while Phin and I were suddenly stopped by my surprise tackle. His laughing eyes were much kinder than that of the lizard, and he had to ask, “Will you go out with me?”

“I can’t,” I sadly replied, and he slowly put me down. It was clear that he didn’t understand and I tried to explain, “Dating you would be great, but I’m not ready for another break-up, and I’m not convinced that we would be good together for life.”

“It sounds like what you want is a dating contract that will automatically end in 6 months,” he replied wryly.

“That’s exactly what I want,” I exclaimed excitedly. Then after looking at him, I realized, “Oh, you were only kidding?”

“Well,” he replied slowly, “if you would consider dating me and we have the option to renew after 6 months, I would be willing to discuss a contract.” Just then we happened upon our colleagues and had to say our group goodbyes. Phin gave me a professional handshake and with a straight face promised to keep in touch. A few days later, over a 9 hour phone call, we hashed out the fine print of our contract – We were now officially dating until the end of February with an option to renew.

Monday, June 20, 2011

The Official Story - The Butterflies

For me the dating process has never been much fun. Of course there are moments/days and even weeks of joy, but with a hard squint one can always glimpse the circling shark fin indicating a future heartbreak for someone. At the end of the “Craters of the Moon” weekend, I left Phin with a bit of unease. It really seemed like he was in collusion with Someone to pull off the perfect trip - complete with sunsets, a full moon, adventurous exploration and even waterfalls rivaling Niagara to lure my cynical self into unclear waters.

I had always felt perfectly comfortable being with Phin. In fact, in my opinion, we were a little too comfortable with each other since there was no stomach knotting excitement in our interaction. As we sat on the craggy rock watching the sun disappear behind the purple streaked mountain, I was surprised to discover a fluttery excitement. It was so great to share this beautiful moment with someone who had turned my hazy ideas into an actual adventure, creating an exceptional day. The flutters took the shape of butterflies, and one bold creature had the audacity to ask, “Could this be the guy who would help turn thoughts for an extraordinary life into realistic daily living?”

I quickly smothered this butterfly with explanations of nature contriving a romance. The whole episode would be classified as an isolated dip into dating. However, I was soon to learn that once the butterflies are let loose, it is difficult to cram them back into their cocoon – especially ones this audacious.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

We Interrupt this Program...

I have recently been swamped by "to do" lists (one of which contains -update the blog), and I also got ambushed by a cold. When I came to work today this cheerful creature was giving me a motivational cheer! "Ready... OK!"



Don't worry - I plan to get back to the series soon - at this rate there may be a wedding before the full story of "HOW" is truly answered! Don't be surprized if the story is fully revealed at our 25th wedding anniversary party!