A trip to the Grocery Store

The Christmas Cooking Disaster of 2009 combined with other major kitchen mishaps in the last few months had convinced me to give up cooking entirely as a New Year’s resolution. The plan was to focus my energy on other creative, less hazardous projects. This was a good plan in theory, but around the third week in January I got hungry. I had Mother Hubbard Cupboards and my candy stash drawer was down to a few sad Hersey kisses that had long ago lost their ability to pucker. I scrounged up my shopping bag and headed to the local QFC.

Although I had only been avoiding the grocery store for about a month, as I wandered up and down the aisles it felt like it had been years. The food looked amazing. There were samples and sales and soon I had to exchange my basket for a cart. I modified my resolution to oven related cookery and concentrated on foods that could be heated on the stove top or eaten right out of the bag. When my shopping cart was full, for the most part with healthy snacks, I headed to the check-out line. It was with anticipation for a healthy delicious dinner that I watched the checker scan each item.

As I hauled the groceries into my apartment, I could hear the squeak of a pre-packaged plastic bag indicating that once again my kitchen contained fun foods. Twenty minutes earlier, I had argued with myself about buying potato chips (it is not pleasant to find that you have no one to blame but yourself for an empty bag of potato chips even if they are all-natural). However, I suspected from the squeak that one bag had indeed sneaked into my shopping cart. I was a little relieved and relishing the idea of opening up the bag of chips to snack on while I cooked my feta cheese omelet and re-stocked the barren cupboards.

The eggs were sizzling nicely on the stove and I started rummaging through the bags to find the salt and vinegar potato chips. I had put away the majority of items when I finally ran across the air filled plastic bag that held the promise of a challenge to eat just one, once it was opened. I dug it out eagerly – imagine my disappointment when instead of a bag of Kettles Sea Salt and Vinegar, it was a bag of pre-washed spinach!!!! Looking back, I know that I didn’t put any in my cart, and I know I didn’t see the checker scan any, but I really was expecting to find a miracle bag of potato chips amongst my other groceries.